Ghosts of Past

She showed him the secluded balcony where Karan was standing alone with his champagne flute, she smiled, but before he could say anything she patted him on back and left. Shanty now walked towards the balcony. Karan saw Shanty approach him and his smile broadened “Shanty, look at this moon it is so far from us unreachable, this air always around us but unseen, strange but isn’t love just like this?” Shanty looked puzzled but before he could say or think anything Karan shrugged his shoulders and said “Oh chill dude, let’s go”. Shanty smiled back and kissed him on his cheeks embracing him. Karan hugged back tight. Shanty was noticed that Karan was not his usual since morning in spite of their escapades.

Shanty mounted on pillion seat and gently wrapped his arms around Karan’s waist as Karan throttled the bike; cold breeze caressed them. Shanty rested his head on Karan and planted a small kiss on his beau’s neck snuggling closer to him, eyes closed. Karan stopped the bike and Shanty opened his eyes to realise they had stopped in front of a small but beautiful bungalow in the heart of city, his home. Shanty jumped down “Karan aren’t you coming inside?” Karan smiled an apologetic no. Shanty moved a bit forth and touched his shoulder “Karan is everything ok with you?” Karan didn’t reply but turned the ignition off and walked with Shanty.

Once in room Karan latched the door and took Shanty to his bed, “Shanty, I have a news to share” Shanty caught the hint of pain in his voice and looked up “Shanty, dad wants me to stay with him in San Francisco, I am leaving tomorrow” Shanty looked up for more, he knew there was more to it but Karan was quiet. “Tell me” Shanty touched Karan “Dad, wants me to join his hospital as intern” Shanty was still not getting the reason for pain in Karan’s voice when he heard it, but he remembered one of his conversation with Karan where he had told him how much he hated long distance relationship and how he would never have one. Shanty felt corner of his eyes prick, he turned to look at Karan, “You want to break-up, don’t you?” Karan gave an apologetic look back “We can’t continue, well Shanty I am not sure we can continue its better we call it off” his voice got choked as he spit this all out. Shanty gripped himself as he nodded “Good atleast you decided to break news before leaving. You are free Karan, go” his voice betrayed and he turned to look away as Karan tried to catch his gaze “Shanty, it’s not easy for me either, but I can’t” Karan tried to plea and tell more. Shanty just turned again and smiled back at Karan “Don’t worry, I am fine you can leave” saying this Shanty quickly glided to the washroom he knew Karan was stubborn rather adamant with his so called rules of life and he never bent it nor even for his own good. There was no point taking this conversation forward. Karan lingered for a while and finally made his way out, he knew he had lost Shanty to his own rules, tears ran down his eyes as he popped helmet and throttled his bike away.

Shanty, washed his face, got back to his room, removed his shoes, kept them on shoe rack, rearranged some shoes there, peeled off his cloths put them on hangers rearranged other hangers and checked the wardrobe for anything amiss, changed to shorts, tidied up his bed, rearranged flowers in vase when all was done, he looked around for anything amiss his room was as good as ever, not knowing, what to do next he sat flabbergasted on his bed as reality hit him. Karan was gone, forever!

Days passed again and he saw Shweta in his room, “Shanty, sweetheart why are you doing this to yourself?” he ducked his head in her laps. She ruffled his hair, “He’s gone baby and he won’t come back, you need to move on, for yourself, your parents and for me” Shanty’s breath got stuck in him as Shweta said this and word me. It kept lingering in his mind giving him strength to move on. She was spending every day and most part of night at his place ever since Karan left. She never left his side and most times simply stroked him letting silence talk for them.

He saw days passed by as he picked himself with support of Shweta, it was like they were never separated, and Karan’s painful departure was locked and stowed away in old chest in corner of his heart as Shweta took centre stage. Finally he saw his parents talking with hers regarding their marriage. He grabbed her wrist and took her to the terrace in front of his room while elders were busy. She shone like goddess in the sunlight as he turned to look at her; he felt the guilt kick his gut, he tore his gaze away. “Shweta, you know you are the best thing that has ever happened to me. You have loved me beyond the boundary of realms, and trust me I love you the same or maybe even more that’s why I want you to be happy. Shweta, I have a darker side to my life, the side you’ve witnessed and embraced me with. How I wish I could like to turn back time and change everything and be the good spotless guy I wished for you but I can’t and I don’t feel worthy” he felt her soft thumb and finger pinching his mouth shut “Shanty, you are the perfect guy I want to be with, I know you will never hurt me. I am sure you will keep me happy than I can ever imagine, yes Shanty I am very happy with you” Smile spread across Shanty’s lips pressed in her fingers.

He knew Shweta loved him and her happiness was to be with him, and that was the reason in spite of his guilt he could never leave her, no he couldn’t hurt her anymore. Shanty winced inward and then few more days blurred past him and he was with his wife Shweta in their bedroom, first night of togetherness after marriage. She was his best friend, girl friend and more. It was not there first time but the pull he felt towards her today was more than he ever felt. It felt like his world revolved around her she held all his strings and he could do anything for her happiness. He pressed his lips on her as the passion melted their bodies in one. He felt her rapid hot breath burning desire to get more closer to her his hands traversed the soft contours and moulds of her body as she moaned in ecstasy under spell of his kiss.
Cloths dissolved under the spell of love and Shanty was mesmerised with the velvety softness of Shweta’s skin rubbing gently on his manly yet soft skin. He was enjoying exploring all the erogenous zones of Shweta as she moaned in happiness. He moulded the soft mounds of her breast slowly nibbling the pink tits. Shweta was quivering with all this pleasure as she struggled to grab handful of Shanty’s hair and pull him up to her mouth, she slowly licked his lips parting them as surprised moan escaped him. Her tongue further assaulted his mouth and discovered his mouth; her hands caressed Shanty’s back and shoulder blade.

Her hands were tracing his spinal cord when they slowly reached his ass cheeks which she started kneading slowly as Shanty slowly surrendered himself in Shweta’s embrace. Her hand now started tracing the mounds of his chest playing slowly tracing her way down to his love pole. Shanty shuddered in her kiss as her soft hands held his warm, silky rock hardness her slender fingers tracing all the throbbing veins on his love handle, his foreskin was slowly pulled back as she traced his mushroom head with softness of her palm.

Slowly she left Shanty’s lips with a slight peck and glided swiftly to satiate now demanding member. Shanty hissed loudly as her lips traced his mushroom head in a circular motion to reach his piss slit licking the blob of precum, she swiftly engulfed him. Her head bobbed up and down as Shanty moaned in pleasure. He felt climax nearing so he swiftly got Shweta back to face him; eyes met, both hazed with the love potions.

Shanty had his lips fervently over Shweta’s he dug in deeper and traversed every ounce of her mouth as his hands held her firmly by her waist and back and other gently traced the curves and contours of her shoulder, neck, bosom, midriff, slowly making way for his ultimate goal he slowly spread her legs tracing her inner thighs, he swiftly moved from her mouth to reach between her thighs he softly kissed her inner thighs as he firmly held her by her waist and slowly slid his lips to dive in for love nectar. The pink colour and soft velvetiness drove him wild as burrowed in deeper with sloshing sound and her soft moans which were turning in to groans. No sooner she was groaning aloud as her love cavity filled with sweet nectar, which Shanty drank merrily. Shweta pulled Shanty up to her from between his legs as his hardness pressed slowly on her very sloppy wet cavity – both hissed with anticipation. Shanty gripped her as she positioned herself better underneath his warm embrace. Shanty swiftly moved close to her as his love handle got engulfed in her love cavity both tightened the embrace as the feeling settled in. Slowly Shanty made to and fro motion kissing Shweta over neck cape and lips.

Both bodies were slick with sweat when Shanty’s body went rigid and flexed as his love seeds got implanted deep inside her body both heartbeats loud enough to be heard over miles. They lay entangled like this for eternity when Shanty slowly moved his face up and kissed Shweta’s forehead, she slowly opened her eyes as smile spread across both their face.

The memories were vivid even after so many days in Shanty’s mind, he felt hollowness in his heart and lump raising in his throat. He covered his eyes with his palm as if that could end this daily routine of travelling the past memories. It dint help, it never did; days flew by and the dreaded day made its appearance, Shanty and Shweta were in his car when the truck hit them hard, the truck was out of control as it hit them from the right where Shweta had been sitting. Shweta’s deafening shriek as he saw her head hit the glass as red glass splattered, his head hit the steering and even in that pain and panic he knew his world had come to an end.

Even after so many years Shanty felt it was just yesterday, his cheek hot and wet with tears, the accident had not only taken Shweta out of Shanty’s life but also his will to live. He didn’t die as he had promised Shweta once that he would never kill himself. Shanty had never been able to get close enough to anyone after Shweta ‘cause whenever he went closer to anyone Shweta’s shrieks and blood stained face haunted him. He felt he was cheating her and felt repulsive towards his partner.

He turned as his eyes fell on the boy who had returned him his libido after so many years. Strange enough he didn’t feel repulsive when he stroked his hair. He studied the boy, whose face was now blank and eyes wide open. He looked innocent but his eyes did not hide the agony inside him. Shanty felt an urge to protect this boy from this world; he swore he would do his best. Shanty stroked his forehead hinting the boy to sleep as he felt his own eyelids drooping.

It wasn’t long when Shanty got up startled, the boy was sitting near him, he was naked again and agitated from his rapid breathing, he looked down at Shanty. Despite being doctor he felt scared for a second with his demeanour but as soon as his gaze met the boys his heart melted, the boy was speaking some incoherent words Shanty picked out only a few words like ‘I am not slut’ ‘no don’t do that’ ‘stop please’ the boy changed from attacker to victim and was now pleading for help to save him from threat. Shanty swiftly got up and placed his arm on boy’s shoulder. Boy hugged him quickly urging him to save sobbing and hugging him Shanty held him close and stroked his head assuring him that he is safe and now with him. The sobs stopped after a while but the boy still hugged shanty.

Shanty, knew this was good the boy now in his blankness connected with him, he was now part of his world. Shanty slowly put the boy back on bed, but the boy never let Shanty off completely now he snuggled in his chest as they slept on bed. Shanty allowed him to snuggle closer and kissed his forehead and stroked his hair. Slowly soft snores filled the room, Shanty slowly tried to wriggle out but boy only got himself more entangled to him like a creeper on tree. Shanty mused and closed his eyes.

Sun peeping through the window, woke Shanty up next morning. Boy was still sleeping, Shanty as quietly as possible sneaked out of his own bed. He peeped out for the first time after so many years he smiled at the rising sun, and started his day. He had changed and was briefing his intern and nurse regarding the boy’s case in a corner of his room when boy woke up in a jiff as if out of nightmare. Shanty rushed to the bed, the intern and nurse flanked around. Boy was scared he was not looking around he just curled himself into ball, pleading - for apology and asking to be not thrown out. Shanty reached up to him, placed his hand reassuringly on his shoulder the boy was quick to hug him.

“Please don’t send me away” He urged and tightening his grip around Shanty “Please let me stay here with you, doc” He was speaking to Shanty. Shanty was shocked, did he hear him talk to nurse about moving him to the ward. He couldn’t possibly. “Don’t worry I am just shifting you to ward outside this room” Shanty slowly straightened his hair. The boy was still clutching him hard “I don’t want to go anywhere, please let me stay here, they’ll hit me again please doc” their gaze met and Shanty was moved with the pain and mistrust in his eyes for the world. Shanty turned to the intern, “Well let’s arrange a bed in my room and I’ll be attending him personally” Intern and nurse if shocked were good at not showing it. Shanty now turned back to the boy, put him down on bed again and adjusted sheets around him.
Last night Shanty had hit the chord and made himself part of boy’s world now he had a task of bringing him back to the world. Shanty got mentally busy trying to figure out how?

Late afternoon, Shanty got the much anticipated visit from his local inspector regarding the boy. Cops had managed to get information on whereabouts of the boy. He was from an affluent family in the main city his name was Siddhartha commonly known as Sid. Two weeks back the boy was kidnapped by the goons while he was returning from a friend’s house. The goons not only repeatedly raped him for atleast 12 days while he was in custody but also filmed the act to blackmail his parents for ransom. The goons now though under arrest the story of boy’s fate has reached every house in the city through the video thanks to the much abused technology. Police though have stopped circulation now they have no access to some private copies.

After this incident his parents alienated themselves with the boy and severed all the ties with him calling him faggot and no son of theirs. Since then, the boy was missing till last night when he was delivered at Shanty’s Sanatorium. Parents don’t want anything to do with the boy, Police can’t keep him with them as his case is closed with goons under arrest and the boy was over the age so once he was good to go he was on his own – Shanty quickly realised. He felt the familiar protective self pouncing; it had been years since he had nurtured this kind of protective feeling for anyone.

Shanty, thanked the police officer, and turned towards his room where Sid had spent most of the day sleeping. When he entered his room Sid was staring point blank towards his window. Shanty bolted his room and sat next to him “Sid” he reached the boy’s arm. Sid jumped in his place and looked back at Shanty, with terrified eyes. Shanty slowly stroked his cheek, then his forehead and reached for his hair as Sid’s expression mellowed and he let himself in Shanty’s embrace letting all pain, anger, betrayal and loneliness wash through tears spilling them on Shanty’s shirt as he slowly stroked his hair.

Sid continued to cry his heart out for next one hour while they sat there quietly. Sid’s sobs were now mellowing. Shanty, slowly collected his face in his palms and kissed him his forehead. Sid closed his eyes, I would never let him alone now, Shanty thought. Sid opened his eyes and opened his lips to say Shanty reading his mind shushed him “I know everything, and I am with you. Always” Shanty now again tightened his embrace around him as Sid snuggled closer to his chest, wet with his pain.

They were like this for half an hour when Shanty heard Sid softly snoring. Shanty knew this sleep was healing the wounds on Sid’s heart as much as his love, he carefully put him on the bed tugged sheets around him and walked out of his room for his night round. He instructed the staff on night duty and returned back to his room after an hour. Sid was still sleeping, Shanty peeled off his cloths dumped them in a laundry basket and entered hot shower; he felt hot water sooth his muscles. After a long blissful shower Shanty stepped out and changed in his night cloths. He saw two dinner plates on his table.

He bolted the door, and walked towards sleeping Sid. His innocence was mesmerising, the perfectly carved brows, sharp nose, pink luscious lips, and square jaw. Shanty slowly stroked Sid’s jet black hair. Sid’s eyes opened in a flash and met Shanty’s gaze. Shanty smiled, Sid relaxed “I thought you left me too” Sid mumbled looking at Shanty. Shanty moved himself a little closer “I would never leave you, promise” Shanty assured him. Sid looked back in Shanty’s eyes satisfied he snuggled closer to Shanty. “Aren’t you hungry?” Shanty chuckled though he was already feeling full with Sid so close to him but he knew Sid needed this food for recovery