I don't understand why I just did that

Hi my name is gage im 5'8 mild tan with brown hair and an in the closet homosexual but all I did was get turned on by gay porn I didnt quite accept it.I had always been your normal 18 year old kid last year of school thank God,it was your normal week until Thursday came.first period bell just rang i loved first period i sat next to my friend Collin he made me want to pass out from how cute he was anyway the god awfull math teacher started talking and Collin leaned over hey want to come to my house later sure man.

So the rest of the day went nothing important happened "finally" I said when the bell rang for dissmisal i started walking to my house when someone grabbed me by the shoulder. I was just about to throw a punch when until I turned around and saw it was Collin "OH shit dude you scared the living crap outa me" "sorry" he said come to my house around six "all right."

So i walked up to his door and knock he says "come on in" when i walked he said "whats up." "Nothing much" so we got pretty drunk and I said "hey i can tell you anything right man" i said "sure were best friends"collin said my mind raced i was going to tell him I stuttered a bit "I'm gay" he just stared with his mouth in awe then he yelled "GET THE HELL OUT OF MY HOUSE" and he threw me out so i ran back to my house in tears "it wont be that bad" i thought and slept it off.

The next day when I walked into school everyone looked at me like i was new until my friend Colton came over and said "Collin told us all yourgay he says you came out to him is that true" I was enraged I pushed Colton out of the way. When i found Collin i screamed and the entire school must have heard me "YOU MOTHERFUCKING ASSHOLE" then I threw my hardest punch ever at him so it struck him so hard he fell back then Collin just threw a Haymacker and i just fell on the floor in tears then the schools security guard came and restrainded Collin every then i saw stars and passed out I woke up in the nurses office at 12:00 so I just fell back out and then woke up at dismissal time so when i woke up the principal and security guard were there so the principal said "I want to Know what happened back there" so i just ran out of school and went home.

to be continued