Love At Its Finest

Do you know why I mystriously appeared at this school in the middle of the fucking school year? I'll tell you why. Because at my old school I fell in love with a guy and someone caught me watching him like I saw you looking watching 'you know who' It wasn't just that one time either, I've noticed it for months. Except this person at my old school gathered a crowd behind me and caught me writing his name on some paper.

I took a big chance bringing this to your attention. And Yes!, maybe I didn't go about it the right way, and I'm sorry for that. But I would never want anyone to go through what I went through at my old school. It's just love. People fall in love everday, but they can't understand how one guy can love another. I can, because I've done it.

I must be out of my mind writing this to you eventhough there are no names mentioned. But I see that look on your face when you look at him, so don't feel alone and don't you dare fucking think that nobody could ever possibably understand how you feel when you cry at night. We all cry when reality sinks in. But fuck all that bullshit. I've become very good at hiding my gayness because I had to learn the hard way, but mainly I guess I just wanted to let you know that I think you're nice and ....................um..........well let's face it!....you're a fox! So I guess I'll chew off all of me finger nails tonight wondering if I was in fact wrong about you and that by tomorrow, I'll be the school queer again. But that's entirely up to you. My locker is #415 in the B building incase you have soemthing to say, if not. Just please be careful.

X Unsigned
________________

I must have read that letter a hundred time that night in bed. I had classes last semester with Jared and I couldn't believe (a) that he said what he said to me at lunch, and (b) put this note in my locker. I had never given much thought to the "gay" aspect of things. I just knew that I was in love with James and I wanted him to love me too. I wanted a secret love just between the two of us. I didn't want to be a faggot and walk up and down the streets like they do in Hollywood. I just wanted to show James that I loved him by holding him in my arms, and making him happy when he felt sad.

But after 5 solid years of masturbating, it wasn't enough anymore. There was something missing from the equasion and ejaculation was becoming meaningless to me. I needed James there with me as that feeling approached, to watch me, to help me get there. I had put Jared out of my mind for the most part, but then the worst day of my life occured just as unexpectedly as my love for James did.

I was walking to my geography class and took a shortcut behind the industrial arts building and was stopped dead in my tracks. Right there before me eyes was James leaning against the side of the building. He had one foot on the ground, and the other bent at the knee with his other foot on the wall. In his arms was a girl named Janice and they where kissing. With both of thier eyes closed I could see James putting his tongue in her mouth. I couldn't breathe and I just slowly walked backwards, step-by step hoping that he wouldn't see me or the tears running down my cheeks. 

How could he do that to me? She did love him like I did. She loved a football player, not James the person. The most beautiful person in the word. She didn't cry herself to sleep at night and dream of a life together. I barely made it to the boys bathroom before I threw-up. It's as odd expience to vomit and cry uncontrollably at the same time. I couldn't even hold myself up over the toilet and juat wound up falling between the toilet and the wall while a vomited with my cheek on the cold tile floor. Thank God it was Friday. I just wanted to go home and crawl in bed and stay there until Monday morning.

I cleaned myself up and didn't even go to my last class. I couldn't stop crying, and I couldn't get that image of James and Janice out of my head. The way his eyes where closed. He looked so in love, and so did she for that matter. It was like a movie. The bell hard rung and everyone should have been in class by then, but every turn there was someone coming up the stairs, or walking down the corridor, and I still crying so herd that I staggering like a durnken sailor.

I made it past the A building, I was halfway passed the B building. All I had to do was get passed the C building and I was home free. I saw a teacher and quickly turned torards the lockers and started twisting the dial as if it was my locker. It wasn't until I noticed that it was locker #428 that I realized that Jared's was #415. I slowly scooted down and then pulled his note from my bookbag just to be absolutley sure. I grabbed a sheet of paper and quickly jotted a note to Jared.

[Call me this weekend. I want to talk to you, okay fag. :) 213 555-8764 - just talk, okay?]

I shoved the note in locker #415 in the B building praying that it was really his locker because I obviously put my real phone number on the note. Jared didn't even wait til Saturday. He must have called as soon as he got home that Friday becuase my phone rang at 3:42

I was still crying when Jared called even though 2 hours and 32 minutes had passed since I'd seen James and Janice kissing.

"Hello" I said.

"Um...Alex?"

"Hi Jared. I sort of thought you call me tomorrow." I said.

"Are you crying Alex?"

"Yeah. I can't really talk right now Jared, ya know?"

"Are you okay?"

"No- just call tomorrow K." I said.

"Sure - But you got me a little wigged out. You'll still be alive tomorrow. right?" Jared said.

"Huh? why wouldn't I -- Oh that! No! don't wig on that. I'm Catholic, that's not an option." I said.

"Okay, I'll be sad with you, so just fell half as sad and I'll take the other half, okay?" Jared said.

"Thanks, you'll call me, right?" I asked.

"Count on it!" Jared said.

The poor guy must have really worried because our phone rang at 8:15 on Saturday morning. I was sound asleep having a dream about James behind the industrial arts building. Exept he was kissing me and putting his tongue in my mouth. I heard my moms voice from down the hall wanting to know who was calling so early.

I hoped that she wouldn't come into my room because even from under my covers, I could smell the cum that had spilled out into my BVD's in the middle of the night. I dreamed of James kissing me and grabbing my ass like he grabbed that fucking whores ass. I was fucking soaking wet. I must have cum 3 or 4 times in the middle of the night. I smelt like someone was making pancakes in my bedroom.

"Hey" I said knowing without a doubt who was on the other end of the line.

"I liked your note, and how you called me a fag." Jared said. "But fuck all that! - What the hell happened yesterday?"

"I can't say it over the phone my mom is probably got her ear to the door as it is." I said.

"So- get you lazy ass up and come to my house, I'm making French Toast." He said.

So he gave me his address and went over to Jared's. I wanted to tell him about what I had seen James doing with Janice. I was already all cried out about it but I guess that I wanted to actually hear someone say all of the things that I have kept in my head and heart since the 7th grade.

For some reason, I guess because of my fear of being caught, and because my car was such a piece of shit. I parked in the supermarket parking lot and pulled my bike from out of my trunk and rode my bike the 2 blocks to Jared's house. I always kept my bike in the trunk for the times me car conked-out.

Boy was Jared un-modest, because he came to the door in Jockey briefs and a Quiet Riot shirt that barely covered the bulge that his dick made in the front of his undies. I could see the outline of his head and make out where his balls where. I'm the most motherly like voice Jared asked me what made me so sad. And I lost it. I started to cry and he put his arm around me and guided me into his family room.

We sat down and he pulled my head to his chest and I just let it all out. I told him that I'd been in love with James since the 7th grade and that I saw him kissing Janice. It felt so liberating to have someone who was like me sit quietly and listen to me pour my heart out. To say the words "I'm gay" to another person who took it like it wasn't anything more then me saying I was 5' 7" or an Aries.

We had been talking for more then an hour before I even asked who was home and what would that think if they saw him holding some guy who was crying while he was half naked. That's when I found out that it was just Jared and his mom and she knows that he's gay. 

I met Jared's mother later that day and out of the blue Jared told he that some boy at school had broken my heart. The strange part was that I didn't care. She was very supportive and didn't seem phased that her grown some was walking around in the briefs with an obviously large penis stuffed in side of his briefs. The bulge was larger then mine, that's for sure.

Jared invited me to spend the night the following weekend and he waisted no time seducing me into my first sexual enounter. It was just supposed to be us jacking-off in front of each other but at some point, Jared comented on my technique.

"Jeeze Louise! so it down there slugger before you hurt your self. Here watch, like this. Real nice and slow." He said.

He took my dick and didn't grip it like a baseball batt like I did. He used his thumb on one side and just 2 fingers on the other side and stroked my cock so nice and slow. I couldn't believe how good it felt to have his hand on my dick, or that he was actually gonna make me cum by stroking it a slowly as he did. So I took back over and within a few seconds my cock flopped over limp like a wet noodle.

"No! watch how I do it. Like this, up and down really nice and slow. Just close your eyes and picture what my hand looks like on your cock. By the way, is a very nice looking cock." He said.

"God Jared! you got me so hard and you barely even moving your hand." I said with a voice that was obviously what he wanted to hear.

"Alex, don't be afraid to cum just because I'm doing it for you. If you want to take over when your ready to cum, just say so. But if you feel like your ready to cum and don't care that it's me doing it just go ahead and cum and enjoy it. That's what friends are for." Jared said.

"Well you're in for a big surprise." I said

"How so? This thing is what 6 - 6 1/2 inches"

"No! I'm talking about how much is gonna fly out of it with the way your making it feel" I said.

Jared layed on mt right side and put one hand on by chest and used his right hand to work whatever magic type of handjob he was giving my. I closed my eyes and never opened them until I was finished cumming. Jared did that slow thing with his fingers up amd down while massaging my shaft at the same time. I could feel my balls disappearing and out of some instinct, I reached out and started rubbing my hand on Jareds back while he slowly masturbated me.

As soom as my legs went stiff and my breating got heavy Jared whispered the most sexual words that had ever been spoken to me.

"Yeah Alex, You're close buddy I can tell. Don't force it, just relax and let it cum when it's ready to come. You're a shooter, I can tell. I can't wait to see it go off. Mmmm all of your hot cum is going to go all over both of us." Jared said in the sexiest voice.

Jared reached up and started tweaking one of my nipples and that was pretty much all that it took for me to reach the edge. I felt like a kid cumming for the first time again.

"Oh God Jared! I'm gonna cum. Oh fuck and I ever going to cum!" I said.

And the second that I started cumming, Jared gripped my cock and started jacking me off, really fast in all directions. I could feel my warm semen splattering on my face, neck, arms, and even down on my legs. It was by for the longest ejaculation I had ever had. When I opened my eyes I saw the magnitude of my ejaculate. There was almost as much of my cum on Jared as threre was on me.

Jared, for some reason didn't want me to jack him off. He asked me to massage his balls with one hand and play with his nipples with the other hand. He did it just the way he did to me. I have never felt so aroused before until I felt Jared's cum splatter mostly onto my lap and legs. We got into his shower, and it was the first time that I had someone other then my mother wash my body more then a decade ago. 

Jared tried to kiss me but I stopped him and told him that I didn't want to to that. I could tell that it saddened him, but he played it off pretty well. I was still in love with James and I didn't see that changing anytime soon. No matter what I saw him and Janice doing.

I had secretly experimented sexually with Jared for several months. Our sexual activity was anything but extraordinary. It's widely known that many guys experiment with other friends at one time or another. I had done it years earlier, and it was all part of growing up, except Jared and I weren't kids anymore, and what we where doing was becoming far more the just experiments. It was homosexual activity even if it wasn't intercourse plain & simple. 

My adventure's with Jared started off as harmless sex games. It was innocent and exciting, and deeply satisfying, but it was also unsettling. My awareness of Jared as someone who was much more than a friend was held in check by my secret love for James. When Jared would make me cum and bring me to that untimate peak of pleasure, I'd lay there with my eyes closed, torn between the pleasure and the pain. The pleasure of spraying semen everywhere, and the pain of the fact that it was not James who was sharing this awesome moment with me. 

I'd often cry for myself as well as Jared. He knew that my mind was on James at the very moment that I was cumming. Yet, he did this for me anyway, because he loved me, because it brought joy to me. The fact that I loved James was something that Jared was able to overlook. Jared knew that what he felt for me, I felt for James. Yet, he loved me anyway because he couldn't stop. No more then I could stop loving James. It all seemed so fucking unfair, but it wasn't always like this. Jared and I did have a happy start, but everytime I felt my self falling into his beauty and charm, James, and my love for him would stop me dead in my tracks. It was my reminder that Jared was for "fun", not for "love." For now, my love belonged to James even though I knew that James could never love me, as he loved the girls in his life.

After reaching climax the first time with Jared, going all the way at the hand of the other was the only way to go. Beating-off quickly became our most popular pastime after school. It was entirely mutual, meaning that during the final years of high school, the number of times I gave myself an orgasm probably numbered less than a dozen. It was Jared who made me cum most of the time, and got me to admit that having him do it to me was far better than anything I’d ever by myself. Then one day Jared was making love to my penis with his mouth like he had done so many times before. As always, I warned him that I was about to cum, giving him ample time to remove my penis from his mouth before it spewed. Jared didn't move this time. 

"Jared! - Watch out, I'm gonna cum!" I shouted, but he didn't move his mouth away. Infact, he moaned with my penis in his mouth and sucked harder. I rolled onto my side and grabbed the back of Jared's head and held him in place as I spilled everything into his mouth. He swallowed it as quickly as it shot out. After that, there was no turning back.

From the outset we had different ways of doing it. Jared liked using his hand with four fingers braced against his thumb, rubbing so slowly, going back and forth along the shaft. I liked using a finger and thumb. Not that our penises were all that different in size. For some reason, what I liked most of all was pinching and squeezing on the very end on mine. Either way, we rubbed and rubbed until we where flat out of semen. With regular practice we soon became experts at making the other cum with amazing force, often sending our semen to the wall above our heads. Then later, to the back of our respective throats.

Together, we learned how to pleasure each other in so many ways. Our turn-around time was so short that we never had to worry about delaying for more than a minute to get our breath back. There were even a few times when we jacked-off and then sucked each other to exhaustion, when our dicks became bloated from overuse.