Mind Games

Note : This story is completely fictional!

Why do they have to play mind games? Our little hearts are so fragile, yet we give them away fully these guys. We know they will be hurt, we know they will be left behind for the next available female( to play the straight card), but yet still we give them our hearts. And we just sit here, thinking “what are they thinking?”, foolishly hoping their thoughts are on us. But even if their not, I heard this great motto, that I live my life by now…

Dance like there is nobody watching
Work like you don’t need the money
And Love like you’ve never been hurt

And that’s why I will continue to be another player in their mind games.

The reason why I bring this up is, because there is this guy that I’ve kinda known my whole life, that plays these games with me. I met him when we were kids, like toddlers playing with remote control cars and Sega Genesis but then he moved away. I didn’t see or think of him for 10 whole years, until I heard he moved back to my hometown, and that day I seen him coming out of my back yard….

One week prior to him coming back, my aunt tells me while making her famous chicken salad, “So I hear Dion and Shay are coming back this weekend.”

“What? Really?” I say in slight disbelief.

“Yeah, they are moving down here to stay with their father.” She says. A few months before this she and their dad got their realtor licenses, and went into business together. “Now you have some one to play with.” she laughed.

“Ha, your funny.” I said not really caring. I put it out my mind, didn’t really think about it. I was 17 at the time, dark brown hair, swimmers build 5’9, and it was around my first months of high school. I was walking home from school with my best friend, when I turned into my driveway, the door to the back fence opens up, and I see two short little boys walking towards me. I say “Who the fuck is that coming out of my backyard? What the fuck?” to my best friend. She was like

“I Dunno but I’m out, peace.” and she chunked the deuce and walked to her house across the street. The closer they got, with big smiles on their faces, the more I recognized them.

“Oh shit, its you guys.” I yelled. Shay the oldest, same build and hair as me but so much shorter at 5’4, came up first. Followed by his younger brother by 1 year, Dion, he’s average build with black hair and 5’6. I gave them both a hug and let them inside so we could talk. They didn’t wanna come back down here, which made it feel like they didn’t like me personally, but I now know it was just homesickness. I was instantly attracted to Shay, his lips were so perfect. But then my brother came home a few minutes later and that’s when it all jumped off. Like old times, the laughing, the fighting, and the awkward silences. Soon night fell and we just sat around watching TV, until it was bed time for me and my bro cause we had school the next day, unlike them. But they didn’t have beds yet so we all just slept on the carpeted floor (my brother even made a little fort under the pool table like we were kids again). I couldn’t sleep though, all I could think about was Shay. I just wanted to kiss his lips so badly, I didn’t know what to do. So I just laid as close as I could next to him. He woke up once and just laughed, I think he was still in a dream I dunno, but it confused the hell out of me, so much so that I fell asleep in my thoughts.

When I woke up for school…. a hour later. I felt so nauseous, I didn’t even go to school. That would have been a plus if I could of spent time with Shay instead of me and him, it was in the bed by myself, and him looking for houses with his dad and brother. So this goes on for weeks and weeks, the days he doesn’t spend the night are the days before I actually go to school. Which causes me to fail my first year of high school, my first year failing anything to do with school.

I hadn’t had an idea if Shay liked boys or girls, I myself didn’t know what I liked. I had a girlfriend and all of a sudden Shay comes back into my life, a kid I haven’t seen for so long (which lead to her breaking up with me for “lack of attention” a month later), and now all I can think about is him. So one night when we are around the age of 18, when he’s spending the night, I say to myself “I’m going to put my lips on his.”. He was laying down, ‘sleep’ or so he seems. I crawl up next to him and just stare at his face while the light from the TV randomly lights it up. I was so nervous everything around me slowed down and I could no longer hear sound. It took me a few times of hesitation and moving around back and fourth to get my nerves in check. So FINALLY, I hovered my head slightly over his, lined up my lips with his, and slowly went down until our lips met. It felt so good to rub my lips against his. But what shocked me is when his lips slowly curved upward into a smile. “Oh my god, is he awake?” went off twenty times in my head. I didn’t know what to do, but what I did do was jump off him quick, fast and in a hurry. I got in my bed, completely freaked out, and went to sleep. I asked myself though the years that followed “is he trying to trick me, or catch me, why doesn’t he say anything if he knows I kissed him, was he really sleep.” These questions he made me ask myself over and over and over again, now I know that it was just a mind game.

No it didn’t stop there, he kept ‘playing’ with me, ha… like my aunt told me he would. But it got deeper and deeper till I figured it out. It all got real, the first day I spent the night at his house. That day, we were around 18, I went to this concert downtown, which was right a few streets from where Shay and his family lived. It was about 11 at night when it ended and my house was across town, I wasn’t sleepy, but that’s what I was to spend the night at Shay’s house. There were no extra beds, or a carpeted floor… Shay’s bed wasn’t the only option, but that’s what I acted like it was. In his bed, under the covers at last, this only happen in the fantasies I formed in my mind. I soon found out he was wearing nothing but basketball shorts, I was in jeans and a t-shirt which swiftly became just a t-shirt and boxers. I’m a perfect sleeper, I don’t move or snore or anything, but with him I purposely tossed and turned, even though I knew he was the same, I thought it was normal when he tossed and turned as well (mind games). Finally my leg found his, as well as the soles of our feet. As soon as they touched, I didn’t move, he didn’t move, It felt so good. At that moment I would pay anything to just stay like that. But I had to test something, to find out if I was in a game, so when I moved my foot away, he started moving again, until his foot found mine which made me feel so good. I started to rub my leg up his, until he turned over and wrapped both of his legs around mine like a sand which. Still, I had my doubts, I kinda gave him the benefit, but all that went away when I started to rub my hand up his legs. They were so smooth and warm, I kept going until I got to his underwear.

What I didn’t know until this point that he had removed his basketball shorts in all the tossing and turning. Anyway, back to my hand, when it got to his boxers I felt around for his dick. It didn’t take long, a few seconds, I grabbed it and noticed that he was slightly aroused. Now knowing that he was semi-hard from me just touching him, let me further know that he felt something for me like I felt for him. But what happen next, was completely out of line, uncalled for, and pissed me the fuck off. His hand came to mine, and when he touched me my hand went limp instantly. He lifted my hand off of his dick and put it on my stomach, then he took his hand off mine and it felt like he disappeared from all my senses. “WHAT!#*$%?” was all that was heard in my mind. I felt abandoned, rejected, hurt, neglected, shameful, and furious all in the same second. I was so mad I couldn’t think straight. “Why would he do that, why would he stop this, why would he act like nothing happen, why why why?” I asked myself. I didn’t do anything that whole night. But a few hours later I felt his foot touch my foot, it felt so good, but I was still confused, pissed, and hurt. Yet, still, it felt so good. And he was good, very good, in playing this game, letting me know that this was his game, and he was controlling me, he had my emotions and he could do whatever he pleased with them, without even saying a word.