My German Lover: The Epilogue

*** Yes my friends, that’s the very last chapter of “My German Lover” story. Now, it’s time for me to bring you “up to date”. But before I do so, I’d like to take this opportunity to express my gratitude to a very dear friend of mine from Oregon (USA) who spent a lot of time reviewing the Epilogue for me, correcting my mispellings. Thanks pal for the good work. I love you.

Now, on with the Epilogue.

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The first thing I did when I moved back to Montréal was to go back to my swim training. I new it would help me get better… and it did.

Since we have an outdoor swimming pool at our house in Montréal, it was easy for me to train every morning. And since my friend Richard had decided to train with me… well, he was at my house every morning!

At first, I didn’t mind having him at our house like that. But it didn’t take me long to realize he was invading my life! He was always at our house… and I started to wonder why.

Yeah… I know. It’s true that once, I was madly in love with him. Hey… I even had to leave Montréal because of that. But to me, that was a long time ago. So many things had happened in my life since then. And one thing was certain: I was no longer in love with him. Now he was my best friend… sure… but that’s all.

Near our pool, we have a small cabin where we can take a shower and change. So after our daily training, we would go there to take a shower… and change.

One morning as I was taking my shower I turned around and saw Richard there, checking me out. I looked at him and said:

“… Are you checking me out or what?”

“Oh… sorry”, he answered. “You know Jack… you look great… no, I wasn’t checking you out… I was just trying to see the scars on your arm and leg. You know… they did a pretty good job! Your scars are almost invisible!”

“Yeah. I know”, I answered, grinning… “They did a great job indeed”…

His explanation seemed normal to me. At least that day…

But the following days, I noticed he was still checking me out… It started to annoy me and so I decided I would no longer take a shower over there with him, and wait until he was gone to take my shower. Of course, he noticed… and he asked:

“Hey… why don’t you take a shower anymore after our training?”

“…I just don’t feel like it. But don’t worry Richard, I’ll take one later…”

One night, a few weeks later, as Richard was at my place (again…), and as the two of us were watching TV, he turned across and, out of nowhere he asked me:

“… Tell me pal… do you still think I’m attractive?”

“Huh?”, I answered… Then I said: “Attractive? Well… you’re a good-looking dude Richard! No doubt about that.”

“That’s not what I meant…”, he answered… “What I meant is… well… are you still attracted to me?”

“Oh shit Richard! Why the hell did you ask me that question, huh? Why?”

“…Because I want to know…”, he answered.

“I can’t believe you’re asking me that…”, I replied… “And I don’t see why I should answer your question since there’s no in point answering it…”

“…Why do you say that, huh?”

“Cause you’re straight pal, in case you forgot! And as I said Richard, I’m no longer in love with you so…”

“Yeah… but still, you may want to make love with me…”

“I’m telling you pal: You’re crazy! Are you out of your mind or what?”

“…You didn’t answer my question…”

“Your question? If I’d want to make love with you? The answer is no, cause I’m not in love with you anymore. Do you know the difference between making love with someone, and having sex with someone?”

“… It’s all the same…”, Richard answered…

“If it’s all the same to you, good for you! I don’t care. Now Richard, please, change the subject okay?”

“Whatever… but then, don’t tell me you wouldn’t like to have sex with me…”

“Are you deaf or what? Change the subject I said”, I told him rather sternly.

“You’re still thinking about Mike, huh?”, he answered…

I looked at him and said:

“It has nothing to do with Mike, Richard. Nothing at all. Now I’m telling you for the last time Richard… just drop it okay. That’s enough! I’m warning you…”

“…No. I’m not Richard. Really… I’m not. But please, stop asking me stupid questions like that, okay?”

“…They are not stupid to me…”, he answered.

“Look at me Richard: I don’t intend to go on with this conversation. Is that clear?”

“(…)”

“Now let’s drop it and let’s watch TV, okay?”

“…If you say so…”, he answered with a sad look on his face…

“Yeah!”, I replied. I was really starting to get mad at him…

In September of that year, I went back to college and at first it wasn’t easy. I had to adjust… but after a while, well… I got used to the way they were teaching at Brébeuf College. I made a few friends there and began enjoying being back…

Was I still thinking about Mike? All the time! I was doing my best, but some times I couldn’t help it and tears were coming to my eyes. I had to control myself! The worst part of the day was when I had to go to bed at night. Alone. I missed him so much!

How many nights did I cry? I don’t know. Many. It was so hard…

I also found it very hard to go back to live with my parents at our house. Not that I don’t love them. It had nothing to do with that. It’s just that I had gotten used to living away from home and now, being back there… it felt like I had gone back in time and was right back to where I was when I had left Montréal so long ago… and I wasn’t happy with that. And it didn’t take me long to realize that it wouldn’t work. I had to be on my own…

So one night I talked to my parents and told them how I was feeling about that. My mom grinned and said they knew that I wouldn’t want to stay at our house for very long! “You don’t have to explain you know. We understand”, my dad said, looking at me with a nice smile on his face… 

At first, I went to look for an apartment. But I soon realized that apartments were very expensive. So I started to think that maybe, I should buy a condo instead of renting an apartment.

Now I must explain to you that Mike had taken an insurance policy on his life and that I was the beneficiary. He also had an insurance policy with Club Med… but his parents were the beneficiaries. That was normal. But when Mike passed away, the proceeds of one of insurance policies was paid to me and so I received a good amount of money. Plus I had the money I had inherited from my grandfather….

“Dad…”, I said to him one night… “Look… I’ve been around, looking for an apartment… but I find that renting an apartment would be like throwing money out of the window. I have enough money to make a very good down payment on a condo… but as I’m still in college and I don’t have a job yet, I don’t see how I could pay the mortgage payments each month… and there are all the other expenses. Now, I intend to find a part-time job, but I mean… ”

“…Look Jack”, my dad answered. “You want to be on your own? That’s what you want, no?”

“Yes dad. That’s what I want…”

“As we’ve already told you, we understand that son. Now, I think it’s a good idea to invest your money into a condo! That’s a wise thing to do. You already know that we’re paying for your brother Robert … and as long as he keeps studying, we’ll pay for him. Same for you. So… we’ll make a deal with you…”

“…A deal?”

“Yes. As long as you stay in college… and if after college you go to University… don’t worry about the expenses. Buy your condo. Your mother and I will pay the mortgage payments and your other expenses. But if you stop going to school, well… you’ll be on your own my friend and you’ll have to find a job. Do you understand?”

“…You would do that? You would pay…”

“Yes Jack. All your mother and I want is for you to succeed in life! And be happy. That’s all we want! And we’ll do our best to help you… you can count on us!”

“… Shit. I wasn’t expecting that dad… I mean… To own my own place! At my age… Will you and mum come with me to find a place?”

“Sure son. You know we would never let you down, don’t you?”

“Yeah. I know. And do you know what dad? I love you. I love you so much…”

“And we love you too Jack. So much…”

“I know”, I answered with tears in my eyes…

So over the following weeks, we all went to visit condos in Montréal… and in the end, I found one that I fell in love with! But it was very expensive!

“..You like it?”, my dad asked me…

“Yeah! Sure… But did you see the price?”

“Yes. It’s expensive. But it’s a good investment!”, my dad answered…

“Maybe. But what about the mortgage payments?”

“I told you son. Don’t worry about those payments. We’ll take care of them. As long as you stay in school that is…”

I was beaming! A dream come true! My own place… with the most beautiful and stunning view over the St.Lawrence River. What a dream! I just couldn’t believe my luck! For once, something was going right in my life! Something good was happening to me. And there was even a big indoor swimming pool inside the building where the condo was located. Just perfect for me!

So I bought the condo. I used a large chunk of my money to make a sizable down payment then borrowed the rest of the money from the bank. Of course my dad also signed the mortgage papers as collateral since I didn’t have a job and the bank wanted to make sure the monthly payments would be made on time.

And I found a part-time job! To cover some of my personal expenses. At first, my parents didn’t want me to take a part-time job because they wanted me to concentrate on my studies. But then I convinced them that a part-time job would not hamper my studies… and that it was time for me to work and earn some money by my own. And they agreed.

The day I moved into the condo… I was so elated, I couldn’t believe my luck. It was so beautiful. The condo had no outside walls: Only window panes, from floor to ceiling. And the view over the St.Lawrence River! Oh shit! The condo was located on the eighth floor of the building and some of the window panes were sliding doors, giving me access to a very long balcony where I installed a table with chairs, a charcoal grill and many plants!