My Life Beyond Fantasy |Part 2|: Things Are Deceiving

He pulls me on him and starts licking my nipple.
“Oooh, nice and clean, eh?”
Luke starts to pull down my towel, and licks me all the way up to my cheek. 
“Yeahh…you like it when I fuck you hard, don’t you?” he says with his tongue barely in his mouth.
“No. “ Carl pops into my head. 

And I stop it. And I can’t believe I’m stopping it. 

“Don’t come to my house, and expect sex when you feel the urge to stick it somewhere!– what am I, your fucking whore you can push around without even paying?” 
Did I really say that!?
“Ahh, come on B – don’t act like this...”
“Act like what!? – This is stupid, haven’t you gotten enough today!? – Just get out of my fucking house”
“Brandon, come on – don’ t be like this, I thought we had a deal?” he says softer than he usually speaks
“Fuck the deal – I’m out.”

I need to get away from motherfucker. So, I grab a pair of freshly ironed jeans, a pink polo, and some briefs. 

And I’m gone. 

-8:35: Church St. ‘A.K.A. Gay Neighborhood’-

Lights flashing everywhere; men kissing men, women kissing women- it kind of seems fuckin’ crazy. 

Did I wear too much? Should I have been more obvious about being gay? Is wearing a pink Lacoste Polo not gay enough?

OK - I feel stupid. Where do I go? The known gay bar, Woody’s? The club Fly? Where to first? I think I like just standing here minding my own business. 

So- to tell you the truth…I’ve never been down here. I’ve driven past Church St., but I never had the chance to actually stop and look around. 

This change is good &holy-fuck-I’m-scared-shitless, but this is better than feeling empty after just getting fucked by Luke. 
But this makes me want to run like a screaming little girl, and just go back into my ‘comfortable’ space of…all….hetero…friends. Shit. 

OK - Maybe I do need a change. 

“Hey, what’s up hottstuff?” 
This man approaches me. Brown longish hair, kind of green eyes- I’d say a look-alike of Heath Ledger circa ’10 Things I Hate About You’. Except this man looks more fit, a bit older, and well…the kind of guy that screams sex.

“Hey…” I say trying not to stare at his pecs...too much. 
“You look lost lil’ fella’” he starts coming closer…chuckling a little bit. 
“Heh. Not really – just kind of new to this…area –“
“Who isn’t? It changes constantly, but change is good -right?” he replies with his one noticeable, but not too Peter Gallagher, eyebrow. 
“Yeah…change is good.” I smile, and follow him to Woody’s. 
- - - - - - - - - - - -
All I can see is his eyes. His perfect hands rub everywhere, and his cock is pushing into my stomach. He’s like 6’2, and I’m only 5’11, so he’s kind of towering over me. I feel dizzy, and I think it’s from all the lust. From not cumming in two days. Yeah, that’s it. 

-11:45: Back-alley Of Woody’s -

I like kissing. I don’t wana fuck, so I’m just staying in this region of kissing, and maybe some blowing. Who doesn’t love a hot blowjob? 

My head starts to hurt. I think it’s from all the drinking. Fuck, he bought me too many drinks. 

All I can feel is his hands rubbing against my dick, and really trying to get me hard. He kisses me, and it’s been too long since I’ve been kissed like this – I don’t even notice my pants are at my ankles and I can’t find my shirt.

Fuck, I’m too dizzy so I try and push him away, but he just keeps going. 

“Noo…dude I don’t feel so good” I’m stumbling over my words. I can hear all these guys yelling and cat-calling on the street, and all the commotion around where we are…but no one can see us, and I feel faint.

“Its okay, you’ll survive”, he says while licking my ear.
“No, seriously, I feel like passing-out” 
“Then do it...”
“What the f-...?”

Darkness. 

I start opening my eyes, and he’s fucking me. His dick is in me, and he’s pounding away. Moaning. Panting. 

“Oh, yeaaah – richboy likes it up the ass, don’t he?” He’s staring at me like I’m his prey.
“Noo…please- ” I say mumbling. I can’t scream. I want to, and I feel sweaty, but not the good sweat – all I want to do is throw this guy off of me, but I can’t. 
“Please, what?” he whispers 

I’m too weak.

“Don’t deny how much you love this..” He says ramming me harder. 
“It hurts..” Is all I can say.
“Oh yeah? That’s how you like it, right?” he replies and takes off his tank. 
He throws the black tank on my face and all I can see is black. 

“Oooh fuck yeah – swallow all of me..”
- - - - - - - -
My eyes open, and I’m drooped over this guys legs, and his dick is in my mouth. And I’m gagging. 

And he cums.

I don’t want to swallow it because I feel like puking, but he’s shoving it down me and I can’t find my arms. I feel numb, and I can’t get enough strength to bite his dick...and when I try – he moans loader, because my teeth won’t give me strength. 

And I’m out. 

-8:20am: Back-alley-

‘Fuck’

I can feel my briefs on, but I feel more than naked. There’s garbage on me and I try and put my clothes on, but I feel like I’m gonna tip over. I run to the street and all I can see are people going about their everyday life, not even paying attention to the boy with half his clothes on. Bruised. 

He stole my watch.

I start to cry. And I hurt. 

And he stole my watch.