The Long Mile Shot II

Sean laid on the grass in tears when his parents arrived home soon after and when they saw him they pleaded for him to tell them what was the matter but he couldn’t talk between painful cries. As Jake drove off not looking back he tried to convince himself that he was right in his decision to leave Sean, but his eyes disagreed and he started crying. When he got home he waited in the car until he stopped crying but still he looked as if his soul had just been taken. Finally he walked into the kitchen were his parents where at and sat on one of the granite countertops.
“What happened? Are you ok?” His mom asked.
“I’m fine mom, Sean broke up with me. We both realized we weren’t meant for each other and so he ended it. I don’t want to talk about it and I’m going to go shooting. The weather looks bad so I’m just going to shoot from my balcony. If it gets to loud just tell me and I’ll stop.” Jake said as calmly and controlled as he could before walking to his room leaving his parents. Jake was a perfect liar and could lie to god himself if he had to but his parents knew there son better and even though Jake wouldn’t tell them how he felt with words, he would definitely express it in the way he was going to shoot. For years now whenever something bad or good happened to Jake he would always go shoot after words and would express himself on what gun he shot and how he shot it.
“Jake are you going to change out of your normal clothes?” Jake’s dad yelled up the stairs.
“No, these are fine.” Jake replied. If Jake shot in his shooting gear then he was practicing but if he was in normal clothes something was different. If he shot a pistol fast he was sad, if slow he was happy. If he shot a bolt action rifle he was trying to relax. If it was an automatic he was overjoyed but if he loaded quickly he was furious. If he used a heavy machine gun that meant he needed excitement. And to top his feelings off was his favorite gun, his Barrett M107 .50 caliber sniper rifle. If Jake fired that gun then it automatically meant it had to do with a guy he liked. If he fired it very slowly he was completely in love, on cloud nine happy. If he fired it fairly quickly something bad had happened like he had a fight with his boyfriend but if he fired it quickly he had either broken up with his boyfriend or had to leave him. Not one of Jake’s boyfriends ever broke up with him. All were madly in love with him and he always broke it off when it either seemed to be getting to serious or he knew he was going to move soon. But he knew he wasn’t moving for a long time from Ash Fort so that couldn’t be his excuse his parents thought to themselves.

“What’s the matter with him Pat?” Lisa asked
“Well I was talking to Sean today and he said Jake had been off for the past week and that they had a fight yesterday because Sean got mad because Jake kept blaming Sean’s pain on himself. I told Sean he should give him his space for awhile and I think he got the hint I was trying to make. ‘Well I’m not giving up on him sir, I can’t and I won’t no matter what he tells me or wants me to do. I love him too much sir’ were his exact words and he meant it to.” Jakes mom instantly knew what was happening.
“Should we go and talk to him about it?”
“About what Lisa? Try and convince him that Spencer’s death wasn’t his fault? How? You know how he thinks; there is nothing we can say to make him think otherwise.”

You see, Jakes deepest secret that he never told anybody was he completely blamed himself for Spencer’s death. The only reason why his parents knew was because just after his death Jake would awake at night yelling as loud as he could.
“I’M SORRY SPENCER IT’S MY FAULT.” Jake would also talk in his sleep as if he was making an argument with someone who was trying to say it wasn’t his fault. “If I didn’t always want to go get a fucking ice cream after school he would still be alive. The only reason why he went was because I wanted him to.” Was Jake’s most used argument against himself. That day when Spencer died Jake made a promise to himself that he would do anything to protect his loved ones and if he failed he would push them away because he knew they would get hurt because of his actions. He thought he had some way or another failed every person he loved except for his parents. The thing is though, none of Jake’s supposed ‘failures’ where neither his fault nor did he have any control over them but he always found a way to put the blame on himself. Even only being eleven and still so young Jake was strong willed and did everything he promised. Just then his parents heard two quick shots ring out as if Jake was shooting right next to them, it had to be his .50 caliber rifle. Eight more rapid shots rang out right after and they new how there son felt instantly.
“I sure hope Sean’s not hurt to bad after this.” Lisa said.
“I don’t think we’ve seen the last of that kid yet dear.” Patrick ended and they now heard Jake firing an automatic machine gun and reloading it almost instantly. On the other side of town Sean’s parents had finally calmed him down to a mild crying and finally got words out of their son.

“Jake broke up with me.” Was all Sean said before running up to his room and locking himself in only to have the tears come back for almost another four hours before falling asleep from exhaustion. Back at the Carpenter resident’s there was also a lot of noise going on for those four hours. Jake had almost none stop been firing different forms of guns in different emotional patterns. He would fire a pistol fast, then an automatic gun reloading slow, then a bolt action, then quick bursts of his .50 caliber followed by a heavy machine gun. Both parents were frightened for there son as he kept shooting into a field of abandoned cars and other objects that had soon almost disintegrated. Finally after four hours of none stop shooting Jake finally came down stairs in just a pair of sweats and no shirt with a massive bruise on his right shoulder.
“Feel any better son?” Jake’s dad asked concerned.
“Yea, a little, but I ran out of ammo so I can’t practice anymore.” Jake said attempting to convince his parents nothing was wrong.
“What type of ammo? Pistol, rifle, heavy?” Jake’s dad asked surprised.
“All of it, I don’t have any more ammo except for a clip in the Berretta I sleep with.” Both parents looked at each other not believing what there son had just said. Jake had kept enough ammunition and guns in his locked room to supply a large army for a sustained period of fighting.
“Jake I think we need to talk, sit down NOW.” Jakes mom ordered.
“Mom I’m fine I swear, I just needed to get stuff out of my head.” Jake said calmly as usual.
“Jake firing more bullets then used on D-day in four hours is not fine and you and we know it. You have a problem Jake.” Jake’s dad said raising his voice at the end.
“I know I have a problem! I’m out of ammo!” Jake replied humorously
“Jake don’t play games with me, your own father who taught you how to. Jake we know what’s the matter with you and you need help son.”
“What like go see a shrink? No dad, you even said so yourself they’d only make it worse or take me away and you know they would.”
“I never said see a shrink, but you need to talk about what happened to Spencer with someone. Anyone! It’s not your fault why don’t you get that.” Jake’s dad said trying to make a last ditch plead. Jake had heard what his dad said and knew that both his parents knew he had problems with Spencer’s death. Neither would say anything about the matter but most importantly he thought to himself that he had never told anybody about what happened to Spencer until Sean came along.
“Dad it was my fault and I have to live with that, not you, not anyone and I just don’t want anybody else getting hurt because of me anymore.” Jake said simply.
“Like Sean Jake? The one who you just told us a week ago you loved and couldn’t stop feeding each other food in the kitchen long enough to make a fruit bowl?” Lisa said. “Mom it’s better for him, he’ll be safe now that he’s not with me.”
“Jake you saved his li.”
“Mom that doesn’t matter, it’s only about the future and I can’t protect him so I can’t be with him. Now I’m going to bed I have school tomorrow.” Jake said just before going upstairs to take a Japanese sleep remedy to knock him out so he didn’t have to think anymore. That night Jake had no dreams, no nightmares and the next morning he knew he had made the right decision. Sean however had the greatest dream of his life. He dreamed that he and Jake were in college making love on the kitchen table just after both did the dishes and fell asleep on a huge fir rug embracing each other. Then they were older and they had kids. Sean had always wanted to have kids but knew being gay would complicate things a little. Jake and he were teaching their two sons to ride horses. Then he could see both their kids getting married and having grand kids. They would bring their kids to ‘Grandpas’ house and Jake and him would spoil them with gifts. It was perfect in all ways until his alarm went off and he came back to reality and he was not with Jake. The next morning Sean drove to school by himself and tried to talk to Jake but with no success. Jake avoided him and all his friends and acted as if none of them existed.

As two months went on Jake didn’t say a word to Sean despite his numerous attempts. Sean would corner him in the hallway, wait at his car, put letters in his locker, but nothing worked, Jake would still not say a single word to him. Jake had quickly started hanging out with Bryan and Tyler and there jock friends and had quickly become popular for flaunting his money everywhere. He would drive expensive cars to school, buy his friends expensive gifts for no reason, and he was happy it seemed like. Sean even thought he was happy and had finally started loosing hope of getting him back. Every night Sean would stay up trying to figure out a way to talk to Jake and everyday his attempts failed. On a Friday after school Sean’s cell phone rang and it was Jake. He didn’t know what to do, he hadn’t spoken a word to him in over two months, should he answer, can he answer, what would he say, was Jake hurt, a million things ran through his mind and finally he missed the call and a voicemail came up and he checked it frantically.
“Hi Sean, this is Lisa Jake’s mom.” Sean’s heart stopped thinking the worst. “I took Jake’s phone, he’s ok though. I don’t have your number and I didn’t want to call your house but would you please come by our house around four, I really need to talk to you, and don’t call Jake’s phone back, he doesn’t know I took it. And don’t worry Jake won’t be home until late tonight, I promise.” Sean sucked in a breath of fresh air knowing Jake was ok, but why had his mom called? Did she secretly want to kill him because she thought he had caused her son pain? Sean thought of the possibilities but finally decided it was best that he just go over and see for himself. When he arrived he had to check in at the gate. Jake had a security officer come by his house and take his gate remote and key back. It had been two months since he last set foot in the Carpenter house and he was afraid when he saw Jake’s Hummer parked in the house car port but soon remembered Jake had stopped driving it and was always driving and expensive sports car now. As if routine he parked in the car port and walked in the side door leading to the kitchen. The Carpenter’s had a large covered area for their cars that they were driving connected to the house but they kept all their other cars in there hanger along with their plane.

“Hi Mrs. Carpenter, how have you been?” Sean said as he found Lisa working in her office.
“I’ve been just great, but Sean, you have never called me Mrs. Carpenter and you are not going to start now you here me?”
“Yes moma.” Sean said humorously. “What did you want to talk about?”
“Have you talked to Jake recently?”
“No, not for two months actually since the day he dropped me off at my house.”
“Yea that’s how me and Patrick feel like, it’s like he just dropped us and left…O I’m sorry Sean.”
“No it’s ok Lisa, I know what Jake was thinking and I get it a little now.” Sean said slowly
“You do?” Lisa asked amazed.
“Yea, I know that Jake wants to protect me and he thinks he can’t so he left me so he couldn’t mess up anymore.” Lisa almost started crying.
“Here I want to show you something in his room.” They went upstairs and she showed Sean a photo album that Jake had made of the week all his friends were together. “He made this after that Sunday when your parents came back, he still cares about you guys no matter what he says, or doesn’t say.”
“I know he still cares, but why are you telling me this?”
“Because…I want my son back. I want my son who shoots guns of his balcony in his pajamas, I want my son that controls himself and doesn’t go out all night partying and come home pretending to be drunk when I know he’s not.” Sean looked at her funny. “Sean dear, we’ve been around the world and trust me when I say; unless Jake’s arms and face are red he is not drunk no matter what he says or does. He has the drinking ability of an Irish dock worker and a Russian author combined. And you know what I really want? I want my son to be happy again. I want to get mad at him for not being able to make a breakfast fruit bowl because he keeps feeding it to his boyfriend, and I want that boyfriend to be you Sean McCormack.” By this time Sean was on the verge of crying but tried holding it back as much he could. The phone rang from in the hallway and Lisa went to go answer it and came back.
“Sean I need to go find a file real fast for work, I’ll be back in a minute.”

“Now what?” Sean thought to himself as he sat in Jake’s empty room. He started flipping through the scrap book and then started walking around looking at things in Jake’s room and finally stood looking at the steal locked door. He tapped the computer screen to see what it would do and it popped open. He remembered Jake putting in a seven digit code and he started typing things in, ‘patrick’ ‘porsche’ ‘pioneer’ ‘minigun’ he type as many as he could think of and finally remembered the story Jake told about Spencer. ‘spencer’, the screen turned green and picture of a palm popped up, “Shit” he said out loud, he had forgotten about that one. He placed his hand on it anyways and miraculously the door opened and as he walked in he heard Jake’s voice on a recording system.
“Sean, I’m sorry but you’re going to die now…Yeaaaa right! Well you’re in here so look around and we’ll talk when I come home. I love you always.” Sean had no idea what was going on. Why had Jake said that, more importantly why was he able to get in? He remembered Jake’s parents once saying that they aren’t even allowed in there. As he walked into the room he wasn’t really taken back by what he saw. It was just a bunch of framed pictures and toys and nick knacks all around sitting on tables as if on display. He went to go pick up a picture but it was secured to the glass counters. As he looked around he noticed most of the pictures were of Jake and another person and both looked incredibly happy. Some had Jake kissing a girl and some had Jake kissing a guy and some we’re just of Jake and a group of people. When he looked at the toys he noticed a lot were just normal everyday toys, tractors, toy race cars, Lego sets, etc. He was trying to piece everything together when Jake’s mom walked in and gasped.
“Holy hell, I haven’t seen in here since we first moved in.” She looked around as if trying to find something then remembered were it was.
“What is all this?” Sean asked.
“Everywhere we move Jake keeps a room of all his stuff and his favorite things. His favorite toys from when he was a kid, different things he was giving from important people, and pictures of his friends from around the world.” Lisa said reminiscing of her child’s memories. They both continued looking around. Sean would ask a question about something and Lisa would tell him a story. Lisa finally came across a picture, “I’ve always loved this picture. It was before Jake grew into whom he is now. Back then he was just a normal trouble making kid.” Sean walked over and it was a picture of Jake when he was young. He was with a cute little blonde haired kid and they both had there arm’s around each others shoulders sitting on a bench. They both had ice cream cones in there hands with ice cream all over each others faces and the hugest smiles you would ever see.
“Is that Spencer and Jake?” Lisa flipped around as if she had just been shot.
“Who did you say?” She gasped.
“Spencer? I was just assuming it was him because of the ice cream. Jake said he always used to get ice cream with a boy named Spencer when they were kids.” Sean said. “What else did he say about him Sean?” Lisa asked in a tone as if she had never heard of this boy.

“Jake told me he and Spencer were very good friends in Moscow when he was eleven. He said they were best mates. They used to go to an ice cream shop together everyday after school and you would buy them both ice creams before taking them home.” Sean paused “But then one day when they were walking there was a shooting and both were hit and Spencer died and that was when Jake started wearing body armor and started taking a bunch of fighting classes.” Lisa started crying and Sean didn’t say anything more. “Sean, you’re the only person Jake has ever told that too, he has never even told us that story but we figured it out because he talks in his sleep.” Sean laughed remembering how cute it was to watch Jake sleep because he did indeed talk when he slept.
“I didn’t know, O my god.” Something in Sean’s head finally lit and he couldn’t believe how he hadn’t thought of it before. It hit him harder then a rail road tie falling on him. “Spencer, he’s the reason isn’t he? He’s the reason why he won’t get too close.” Sean asked.
“Yes Sean, that’s right. He believes it was his fault for Spencer dying and we’ve not been able to convince him otherwise. That’s why he is so into fighting. He thinks that he will be able to protect the people he loves.” Lisa said as she walked out and onto the balcony leaving Sean with his thoughts but soon followed.
“Lisa I’m sorry for.”
“Sean, don’t you ever be sorry about anything, especially for anything having to do with Jake. He is so stubborn but he is so strong at the same time. For some reason though he chose you to trust with his, well pretty much his life. That one single event has formed his entire life and now we have the person that we both deeply love.” Sean blushed at her last comment.
“Sean you can’t admit you don’t love him and don’t you dare think that Jake doesn’t love you the same.” Sean finally started crying and Lisa went over and hugged him. “Sean no matter what Jake says, no matter what happens, I will always be here for you. Now I need to go do some work. You are welcome to stay here as long as you want, as far as it concerns me, this is your house as well now. I sure hope you choose to stay.” After saying this Lisa left. Sean had so many thoughts running through his head. He was mainly running his mind around the thought of staying at the house until Jake got home. He went back into the room and continued to roam around and think. He stayed in there for almost two hours when finally he was called down by Jake’s father.
“Sean, I’m so glad you’re here. Lisa told me what went on and I hope you will keep your promise to me.” Patrick said as he gave Sean a hug.
“I will Mr. Carpenter; I won’t give up on Jake.” Sean said without hesitation.
“Good, now I hope you will stay for dinner, and Sean never call me Mr. Carpenter again.”
“Yes dad I won’t.” Sean said before laughing. They ate dinner and talked about what Jake had been up to the last two months. Most Sean new about and his parents were very upset about how Jake had been acting.
“He goes out and parties with all new friends. We are happy that he seems to be having fun but we know it’s an act. He’s trying to be someone he’s not and frankly it’s pissing me off. I don’t mind he’s spending a lot of money but he spends it to make himself known, not because he wants to. He hasn’t done anything to you or your friends has he?” Patrick asked.

“No he hasn’t done anything to us, he hasn’t said a word to us really but I know he is doing something because there hasn’t been a single comment from anyone at school about us being gay.” Sean said in a sad voice.
“Jake said he was going out with his friends after school but we told him he had to be home because all of us were going to Australia tomorrow.” Lisa said.
“I don’t know if I should stay, it might be too much for him all at once and he might get mad.” Sean said thinking back to when Jake had yelled at him to get out of his car.
“O well! You tell him. Don’t worry if he’s mad, because if he keeps this up much longer were going to be mad at you.” Jake’s dad said which scared the shit out of Sean. “Sean I’m joking.” With that they ended dinner and Sean helped with dishes and all of them talked until Sean went up to Jake’s room to wait for him. He laid on his bed and soon fell asleep. He was awoken some time later and as he looked at his cell phone it was about 9:30. He heard people arguing down stairs and could make out Jake’s voice and his parents along with other teenagers. All the teenagers sounded sloshed including Jake. They had actually been drinking at Tyler’s house since after school and everybody was drunk or at least sounded to be drunk. Finally all the teens left and Jake continued arguing with his parents and he still sounded drunk.

“Come on mom, we’ll just take the plane for a week, we’ll take care of it. Shelly wants to go to Cabo.” Jake said with a drunken slur.
“Jake you’re not taking the jet on some trip so you can impress your friends.” Patrick said “Whatever dad, I’m going out and I’ll be home tomorrow.” Jake said in a harsh voice. Sean heard Jake running up the stairs and tripping twice.
“Was he actually drunk this time?” Sean thought to himself and stayed on Jake’s bed. When Jake walked in the door he noticed the steal door was open and he instantly saw Sean on his bed and he looked like he was sleeping.
“Sean, what the fuck are you doing here?” Jake said as Sean leaned up off the bed and saw Jake wobbling back and forth.
“Jake we need to talk.” Sean said.
“We’re not talking you faggot, get the fuck out of my room.” Jake said. Sean felt hurt but knew Jake was putting on an act. Sean got scared when Jake came towards him but fell. He remembered what Lisa had said about Jake acting drunk and looked at Jake’s arms and face and they weren’t red.
“Jake get up, I know your faking it.” Sean said with a tone of anger
“What the fuck am I faking?” Jake slurred while he get up. Something in Sean snapped, he jumped up off the bed and ran over to Jake and punched him as hard as he could square in the jaw and sent Jake falling to the ground. When he was on the ground Sean started kicking him in the back and stomach forgetting about his body armor,

“Fuck Jake! Stop being so strong and let go of him. It wasn’t you fault for Spencer dying. I fucking hate you. I wish you had never saved me that night because then I wouldn’t have to see you like this. I would have much rather died then know you would be like this.” After Sean stopped yelling he was just about to kick Jake in the head. In a split second Sean was on the ground with Jake on top of him aiming a pistol at his face. “Jake I love you so much, why don’t you see that? I want to spend the rest of my life with you. If you really don’t love me anymore you better shoot me or I’m going to make you shoot me.” Jake pulled the hammer back and Sean closed his eyes.